TAKING THE KIDS

Family jitters about flying

By Eileen Ogintz Los Angeles Times, 12/2/2001

he New York-to-Orlando flight was overbooked, packed with parents and kids so eager to hit the theme parks that the usually tempting offer of a free ticket in return for taking a later flight wasn't getting many takers.

It would have been a typical Saturday morning at La Guardia Airport - hassled parents, can't-sit-still kids - had it not been for the events of Sept. 11.

''I'm nervous,'' said Nannette Bell, who had just flown into New York from Chicago with her 3-year-old daughter - Bell's first flight since the terrorist attacks. ''But I'd be more nervous if we weren't together.''

Flying with kids, especially young ones, is never easy. Weary parents would normally joke about how they survived the ordeal. These days, no one jokes about flying. In airport security lines and gate lounges, no one even smiles much.

Except for kids, of course. As I crisscrossed the country the week before Thanksgiving, from New York to Chicago to Seattle and back, there were more parents and kids than I expected. The kids still giggled and fidgeted, but they seemed a little more subdued than usual, perhaps taking a cue from their parents as they waited not always patiently to pass security checkpoints or to board flights.

Strangely, despite the anxiety that was evident on travelers' faces, no one seemed as distressed by crying infants or messy preschoolers leaving cracker crumbs in their wake.

Maybe in a chilly, impersonal airport with uniformed National Guardsmen reminding us of how much and how quickly our world has changed, the kids help to remind us of how sweet life can be when a grandmother meets her new grandchild for the first time.

For most of us this holiday season, that excitement we normally feel as we fly off to visit family or to grab some fun in the sun or the snow with the kids is gone, replaced with anxious looks at our fellow passengers. Many children, including my 10-year-old daughter, are nervous about flying.

The situation was only exacerbated with the Nov. 12 crash of American Airlines Flight 587 in New York just moments after takeoff. The crash killed all 260 people on board and several people in the Queens neighborhood where the plane hit.

Millions of us were already choosing not to fly for Thanksgiving, the American Automobile Association (AAA) reported. Eighty-seven percent of Thanksgiving travelers indicated they would drive to their Thanksgiving Day destinations - the highest figure ever recorded.

''We thought travel was poised for a rebound for Christmas, but what this will do to the American psyche is hard to say,'' AAA spokesman Mantill Williams said of the Nov. 12 crash.

''I'm terrified,'' said Lisa Kennedy, who was returning to Chicago from a family wedding in Baltimore along with her husband and two young children. ''We had to go to the wedding, and we didn't have time to drive.''

Some are concerned about flying to larger cities that could be potential terrorist targets.

''I wouldn't want to go to Los Angeles or New York,'' said Lisa Worden as she and her family prepared to change planes in Seattle during a trip from Alaska to Canada, where the Wordens have relatives. She added that she'd bought travel insurance for the first time ever, ''just in case.''

A group of families from Orange County, Calif., were on their way to a Seattle hockey tournament with 16 young players. ''It was comforting to see all the security,'' said one of the moms, Maria Wheeler.

Others were simply determined not to let terrorism interfere with their lives, especially the good times with the kids or grandkids. Now more than ever, we realize how important those times - and the memories they build - can be.

Crystal Tuttle was flying with her husband and toddler from Chicago to the Bahamas to meet her parents for the weekend. ''I want Grace to be able to spend time with her grandparents,'' Tuttle said. ''The stress isn't enough to keep me home.''

Said a resolute Kevin Malloy, a New Yorker on his way to Orlando with his wife and three young kids: ''This is something we wanted to do with the kids, and we're not going to let terrorists stop us.''

Certainly there's an us-against-them mentality, with airline and airport personnel on the same side as the passengers for the first time in years. The gate agents and flight attendants seem nicer, as do passengers. We try not to get frustrated by the extra security measures that keep us waiting in long lines.

Lena Watt, who was traveling with her two young daughters, was stopped and subjected to a lengthy search at the Eastern Iowa Airport in Cedar Rapids, as were all of the family's bags. ''I wasn't prepared for that,'' Watt said, shaking her head.

Debra Vanderheie and Greg McMahon are scheduled to take their three kids to Thailand this Christmas, as are other families in their Seattle school. The much-anticipated trip was organized months ago by Wildland Adventures, whose owners also have a child in the school and plan to lead the group. So far, no one has canceled.

''We budgeted all year for this trip,'' McMahon said. ''When you travel when you're young, you realize there are so many great things to see and do. You're not as afraid to leave home. You see that just because people are different, it doesn't mean they're bad.''

Wherever we spend the holidays this year, that's a lesson we should all teach our children.

Taking the Kids invites reader questions, comments, and stories about family travel. Send them to Los Angeles Times Syndicate, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053 or e-mail eogintz@aol.com.

This story ran on page M6 of the Boston Globe on 12/2/2001.
© Copyright 2001 Globe Newspaper Company.